[Guest]

I am the care-giver for my 97 year old land lord who has end stage renal disease. He is showing signs of Uremic Syndrome. He has declined dialysis. His kindeys are now at less than 20%.

His doctor isn't much help; she complains she has too many patients and this is why she acts so flip about him. So I am asking here in hopes I can learn more and be prepared for the end.

Lately he has had terrible bouts of dry heaves. He does not vomit but they are terrible and it's heart wrenching to watch him struggle for up to 15 minutes while it runs it course. His son-in-law phoned the Dr. Satruday and she phoned in Compazine tabs 20 mg 2 times daily. It seems to be helping.

He only had the 'heaves' once a day for about a month but now, it's at least 3 times a day. He lost his appetite about 4-5 days ago. His vision and hearing have gotten worse, he's often confused when before about a month ago, he was very alert.

He's been having sleep problems, itching and scratching until he bleeds. His doctor had no answer for this but I see this website lists it as a symptom. His prostate closed up about 60-75 days ago and he has had a foley catheter which is removed and changed once or twice per month.

My question is, since he declines dialysis, which is his right, and wishes to die in his home, will his death be prolonged and will it be painful for him?

I will probably be the one who is with him or finds him if he passes in his sleep, as his kids, in their 70's, live in different states but do their best to come and visit several times per year.

I'd just like to be prepared for the end and possibly know what symptoms are signalling it and if there is any medication that would help him have an easier death; I don't want him to suffer needlessly if something can be done. We will have to ask his doctor because she isn't volunteering meds.

I love this man like he was family and want to give him the comforta and assurance that will help him.

Thank you,

Nick Kunkel

[Guest]

He died on Oct 19, 2002. It was a very hard death for him. He was a strong man, a real fighter throughout his life, so he fought until the last day and only went into a coma that afternoon before he passed.

His pain, nausea and muscle twitching was controlled with a topical salve, called ABH, Ativan, Benadryl & Haldol. He had hallucinations which resembled old memories or things he enjoyed, like thinking he was fixing something, imitating the movements with his hands and calling out to family to get things for him.

The last week he slept most of the day and awakened about every 10 minutes at night calling out for someone to come in or help him.

Hospice came in the last 3 weeks of his life so he could die at home.

His family did come help me, afterall, but they, too, were helpless.

The day of his death, he had a death rattled deep from within his chest. He was being given liquid morphine by that time. His blood pressure was barely readable and we knew it would be very soon.

I only wish this forum had more interaction; I could have used some advise and it would have been nice to find someone whom I could have interacted with afterward but I muddled through.

I hope this posting might help someone out there.

Nick


[quote] I am the care-giver for my 97 year old land lord who has end stage renal disease. He is showing signs of Uremic Syndrome... [/quote]

[Guest]

My mother 89 has renal failure. She piddles about 1-2 Tblsps several times a day. And more so at night-time. Within the last week her day sleeping has increeased to pre-vegetable like stage. What are the dying process of chronic renal failure? And the life span without dialasis?
[quote] He died on Oct 19, 2002. It was a very hard death for him... [/quote]

[Guest]

Hi Linda,

It will be a year since his death pretty soon.

The life span really depends. I am not a doctor, which is the person you should ask for that information.

I can sare what the man I took care of went through in his final weeks.

I really recommend you look into Hospice as soon as you can because you will need help caring for her, if she's at home. My landlord wanted to die in his home, as his wife did, which eased his mind a lot.

Since she isn't on dialysis, there will be toxic levels of poisons her kidneys aren't filtering, that will build up in her blood. She may have a whitish film on her skin, which may itch. That's a sign. It's best to buy her a quality lotion like Sarna, found in any Walgreens or the like. It's the best.

She may have dry heaves and produce nothing from them. They can be very taxing and very violent at times.

Towards the end, if she doesn't slip into a coma, she may see things that are not there; talk to people who aren't there. It's best to just talk to her if this happens and let her know she's not alone.

She will sleep a lot, that's true and it will be a hard sleep.

I feel the best way to go is to go to sleep and not awake.

My landlord and friend fought death even though he told me he was ready to go for several years. He slipped into a coma the day of his death. he had a distinct death rattle in his chest and lungs and he labored to breathe.

If you'd like to email me, please do.
[moderator note: e-mail address has been removed]

God Bless your mother and you.

Nick


My mother 89 has renal failure. She piddles about 1-2 Tblsps several times a day...